JADE GOODY is badly missed by her family 16 years after her death, and there are times they “still need her as a mother”; to cope with tough spells, TV host Jeff Brazier has said.
, aged 27, in 2009, when her two boys, Bobby and Freddy — who she had with partner Jeff — were just five and four.
Now, in an exclusive interview with , the TV host has opened up about how he and actor , and Freddy, 20, have been “coming together as a family”; since their tragic loss.
He said: “To lose the mother of your children is a huge trauma that, of course, shapes your life.
“It comes down to the fact that we need her.
“It’s not just about missing her — we need her as a mother at the moment, and we always have done, in all honesty.
“I think sometimes it’s termed that she is missed and we’re doing our best to cope.
“Sometimes, you have no choice but to look at it and realise we need her at this point.”;
Jeff’s words came after we revealed that to stop him seeing his maternal grandmother.
He is trying to legally block contact between his youngest son and .
, and Freddy were last week, presenting This Morning’s competition segment from Malta on ITV.
Jeff told how they had been bonding together working on it.
He said: “It was really amazing to share my work trip to Malta with Freddy this week. He had a fantastic time, learning everyone’s jobs and helping everyone carry their kit.
“He sat in as an apprentice to see how it all works. At first, he was on light reflector duty, and then he was about to take my job, so I am glad that it came to an end.
“I was about to be relieved of my duties!
“I’m enjoying spending time with my son. We are coming together as a family to try to work through a few things at the moment.”;
Jeff and Freddy competed as a team on the last year, and more teamwork could soon be on the horizon for the pair.
He added: “Freddy and I are signing up to a Three Peaks challenge later in the year.”;
Jeff will also be on screens over Easter taking part in the upcoming series of BBC Two’s , which sees a cast of celebrities tackle a trek of around 185 miles through the Alps from Austria to Switzerland.
He was joined on the spiritual expedition, which was filmed last September, by The Wanted singer Jay McGuiness, series 2 winner , comedian Daliso Chaponda, actress , Paralympian and presenter Nelufar Hedayat.
It’s not just about missing her — we need her as a mother at the moment, and we always have done, in all honesty.
Jeff Brazier
Jeff revealed that he found the two-week journey healing as he grappled with his own thoughts.
He said: “It’s a long walk and, really, all you’ve got is time to enjoy the scenery and time to get to know each other.
“It felt beautiful. Nature is incredibly healing. We soon forgot about the cameras and everyone got closer.
“I was holding something that was quite problematic at home, so I found the trip had come at a difficult time for me. But every trip I have ever been on for the last few years has probably felt similar, in the respect that there has been something that has been ongoing for us.
“What I was able to do, that I wouldn’t have ordinarily done, is to be able to say to the group that, if I drifted off or was quiet, and would get stuck in my thoughts and feeling withdrawn . . . then they should bring me back into conversations.
“I wanted to be brave enough to do that. It was a wonderful, brave step into vulnerability.
“Everyone supported me on the odd occasion it happened.
‘Absolute privilege’
“It meant that people were able to share things with me because I had shared with them.
“Typically, I would feel like I was letting people down because I wasn’t my best, joining in with the fun, asking everyone questions — but I acknowledged that I can’t always be at my best.”;
Jeff, who is married to PR boss Kate, has tried to pass on his own life experiences to his boys for them to learn from.
He said: “I try to teach them about being vulnerable as men. I see it as what my role is.
“I’ve got a platform because of the last 25 years, and I want to spread the message that being vulnerable is an absolute strength.
“Both my sons are better than me in most ways. When you’re a parent, you think about what you want them to see.
“My life is this weird polarity between really challenging stuff and absolute privilege, travelling the world for work, and I’m fine doing it, I really enjoy it.”;
Jeff’s own journey with spirituality has seen him embracing meditation, taking ice baths and doing breathwork. He also goes to regular retreats to learn more about himself.
The more accepting of the flaws and strengths I am, the more I feel worthy to turn up to a TV studio.
Jeff Brazier
He said: “I’m a serial retreat attendee. I went to a trauma retreat late last year, and Freddy and I went to one this year.
“I love working with therapy. I’ve worked with psychotherapy, inner child therapy and I’m working with a guy now who was a facilitator on a workshop called The Unmasked Man.
“I like learning about myself and the idea that I am developing and improving. It’s a big motivation to be pushing myself as a husband and as a dad.
“I don’t think I would be able to juggle the boys and my career if it wasn’t for the balance that spirituality affords me.
“I started meditating a few years ago, and the more accepting of the flaws and strengths I am, the more I feel worthy to turn up to a TV studio.”;
Jeff, who found fame on reality in 2001, added: “Before, I would feel hugely inferior to everybody else in there. I was just a kid from a council estate who went on a reality show.
“I was frowned upon for entering the industry in that way.”;
During the trip, Jeff bonded with The Traitors star Harry.
He said: “I found it really easy to hang out with Harry and be with him as I am with my kids.
“There was a lot of mickey- taking, but I also read him to sleep one night, at his request.
“Harry was a sweetheart. He is really intelligent and fun, he has great energy.
“He brought so much value to the group.”;
The first episode of Pilgrimage airs on April 20.
